You deceive me endlessly,
Without compassionate concern.
Corrupting any aspects of my mind, body and soul which remain,
Until I can no longer feel, think or rationally reason.
My life is manipulated solely by your tight, pinching grips.
I believe you.
Do you believe me?
A tandem approach to living.
An absence of my own mind and volition.
Is this the true essence of life?
Or merely just the sheer conviction of “your” empty words?
How could I have and be so utterly foolish?!
Mesmerised by every word, dripping from your ethereal being.
Entranced, captivated, allured, controlled and belittled at every opportunity.
With every last breath.
To reside each day with a dichotomy of what thought to believe?
What action to embark on?
What meagre energy I have remaining to utilise?
You leave me numb.
Vulnerable and disheartened.
Yet I continue to adhere to you,
As if I have no soul, brain, body or life.
The truth emanated from MY mouth today.
Your secret exposed.
Your control, challenged.
Your sneer lessened.
You become angered.
You became fragile and unable to understand how to continue.
You now felt trapped.
Caged, as a soulless entity,
Grappling for a means to claw eagerly to powerful authority.
Oh what strife!
I am unaware why I disseminated the truth?
Possibly because I desire a life?
Because I am exhausted!
Because you do not serve me salubriously.
Because although I favour, praise and bow tirelessly to you,
You are not my ally.
You are the enemy.
Aren’t we suppose to ensure our enemies remain close and our allies distanced?
Maybe this is why I have believed in you all of these years?
To understand and observe your true capabilities?
You have disobeyed and disappointed me.
The truth shall hurt us both.
But the time is now to be liberated.
To be honest.
To be full of vitality and life.
To live my life.
As I choose.
~ No more secrets.
All of my love, thoughts and hugs,